Inspirational Stories

Hospice Provides Crucial Care and Support

A dearly loved wife and mother, Lorna Sloper was a warm, giving woman who bravely battled cancer for three years. She died on 30 July 2005 at Hospice with her husband Murray by her bedside. She was 59 years old.

‘Lorna was a really lovely person,’ says Murray. ‘She was quite shy in some ways, but she was very community minded. She did a lot of work for service clubs. She was also very talented at handcrafts. She made beautiful patchwork quilts and cross work tapestries. We both shared a love of travelling. We were married for 35 years and have a son, Peter, who is 32 years old.’

Lorna was a schoolteacher for many years, and then she worked in a variety of office roles before retiring at 54. Murray and Lorna first learnt that she had cancer in March 2002.

‘We had just come back from a holiday. Her tummy felt quite large and we discovered it was a tumour growing inside her. It could have been there for a number of years, we don’t know. It was an unusual type of cancer that affects the soft tissue. Lorna had a major operation in April 2002, but she recovered from that really well. She was in hospital for about two weeks, but after that operation we went back to travelling and enjoying life.’

Lorna went for regular check-ups and all was well until 2004 when the doctors found another tumour.

‘Lorna had another operation, but the doctors told us this was the last operation they could do. She had a checkup in January 2005 and the tumour had gone. But at the next check-up, five tumours appeared. She had two sessions of chemotherapy, but it was just too much for her. So the doctors stopped the treatments and after that she gradually went downhill.’

It was during this time that Hospice helped Murray care for his terminally ill wife. A home care volunteer visited the family home on a regular basis, and a family support team helped provide further care.

‘The home care volunteer did things like vacuum cleaning the house, making lunch for Lorna, making beds and things like that. She would sit around and chat with Lorna – she was great. We also had a team of five women who came in and they made sure everything was organised so that Lorna was comfortable. It was good because Lorna was never alone.’

With the support from Hospice, Murray was able to continuing working, albeit with reduced hours. Being able to work enabled Murray to ‘get away from things for a while’ and to gather emotional strength. He admits it was hard being Lorna’s primary caregiver and says that it was only with Hospice help that he was able to care for Lorna during this time. In the end, Lorna spent four weeks in Hospice in the In Patient Unit.

‘We didn’t think Lorna would spend all of July in Hospice; we thought it would be a week for respite. But each week there was an obvious deterioration that they could see so she stayed on. They do the room up so nicely and she had all her patchworks and stuff. It was just like being at home except she had the fulltime care of the Hospice staff and volunteers. I don’t know how they do it. They are very special people.’

‘When it was all over they were so kind and good. They took care of everything. Lorna’s mother died the year before so that gave us a good idea of all the things that happen after a person dies. And we had three years when we knew what was going to happen, not like a car accident. The person dies suddenly and you have nothing planned. It is a real tragedy when that happens. We had time to do things before Lorna died. We were able to travel. Lorna enjoyed her patchwork and gardening. I know some people at Hospice have their life stories written up. During this time Lorna wrote her own autobiography – it was really important for her to write her life story before she died.’

Generously, Murray has given a donation to Hospice in memory of Lorna and has also purchased a glass brick for their Foundation Wall. He also gave Hospice a couple of Lorna’s toys that he wanted to benefit children.

‘We went to Wonder World in Australia. Lorna has always been good at sport. She got the basketball through the hoop and she won a great big teddy bear that virtually took up a whole seat on the plane. I decided to give it to Hospice as they have children that go through as well as adults.’

Murray is full of praise for the work that Hospice does and is extremely grateful for the help they gave the family while Lorna was ill. ‘Hospice is fantastic. I don’t know what I would have done without them. I couldn’t have cared for Lorna by myself.’

Karen McMillan